The BandAid Strip:
Hi, and welcome back at Page 5 ...

On previous pages we said the following:

"Yet, that doesnít mean life is all bad. No, as a matter of fact, if you get to know the secrets and the recipe to true happiness, fulfilment and success, you can become so bold and powerful that no hurdle or obstacle can prevent you from achieving your heartís desires ..."

"You are a powerful and exceptional human being with unique gifts, talents and passion, with unlimited potential and creative abilities to do whatever you want to do with your life.  You were born for success and for greatness ..."

And that is who you are! ... whether you believe it or not.

Anyway, if something in your life is out of balance, something is not working or something is missing and you want it restored or fixed, then fix it.

BUT ... when you read the two quotes above and you find yourself wondering:  But WHAT IF it is true?   As this is MY life and MY rules ...

*   WHAT IF I decide to change my rules for my life, and thereby change my whole life in an easy, yet spectacular way?
*   WHAT IF I change my rules and thereby hopefully change my whole life, and find that I really can have true happiness, fulfilment and success?
*   WHAT IF, in the process, I become so self-assured, bold and powerful that no hurdle or obstacle can prevent me to be, have and achieve whatever my heart desires?
*   WHAT IF I turn out to be a unique and exceptional human being after all and not just a mediocre person with a mediocre life, brainwashed to be a clone of the rest of the world?
*   WHAT IF I then find my hidden gifts, talents, skills and passion, and combine it to do something spectacular with my life, like leaving a legacy behind?
*   WHAT IF I then discover that I indeed have unlimited potential and creative abilities to be the best I can be - effortlessly?
*   WHAT IF I, above all, can learn the recipe and secrets involved in such a life makeover and then teach others to do the same - paying it forward?

Okay, I'm in.  Now where do I find the secrets and the recipe to all of this?

Inside yourself!  Yes, YOU already have everything you need to make this happen. 

LET ME EXPLAIN:   Imagine your life is a giant wheel with spokes that reach out to touch every area of your life - work, relationships, family, community, health, faith, finances, etc.  At the centre of this wheel, holding these important spokes together is a core of knowledge, wisdom, experience and instinct, constantly feeding these crucial parts of your life - and this core is called YOU.

The more connected you are to this centre of YOU where all your values, beliefs, skills, needs, desires, gifts, talents, dreams, etc. are stored, the more your life will take on a deeper sense of meaning and purpose. 

Without this crucial connection, you will merely exist by living in circles - feeling lost, confused and overwhelmed because you will have no idea WHO you are or WHAT you want from life.  And if you don't even know what you want, how can you possibly know what you don't want?

Do not assume that you automatically know YOU just because you know what you look like in the bathroom mirror or what your voice sounds like.  If you don't know who you really are, you cannot live your true life which means you are not really alive - you merely exist.

Q:   Do you know who you truly are
Do you know your rules and boundaries for your life?  Do you know why you have these rules and boundaries to protect yourself?  And by the way, if you donít have rules and boundaries, you will be a target and victim all your life!

Tell me about your potential.  Tell me about your passions, your unique gifts, skills and talents.  Tell me about those things that you can do better than anyone else.  Tell me about your achievements that come naturally and effortlessly to you because YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF.

So, you donít know who you really are at your core and you have no idea how special and powerful you really are ... and you never bothered to find out?

Then I suppose you also donít know about the magical 3 keys in your mind that can unlock your whole existence.  Yes, youíve been carrying these 3 magical keys with you all your life and you never bothered to find out how to use them because you never knew they existed.

By the way, if you don't know who and what you really are, you will have no meaning or a sense of purpose in your life which is an inborn essential emotional need in order for you to feel that your life is worthwhile - having value and direction. 

If you don't know WHO you really are and WHAT you really love to do, you will be stuck in a boring life or a boring job with no sense of achievement.  Without achievement, your untouched and undeveloped potential will go to the grave with you.  Without potential and achievement, you should have a very low self-esteem (a sense of self-worth/identity).

Without a healthy self-esteem (self-respect and solid confidence), you will always settle for less e.g. abusive relationships, bad marriages, miserable jobs and a boring life with constant struggles.  If you donít know the marvellous YOU hiding inside of you, you will never find yourself worthy enough to stand up for yourself.

Without a real and true sense of SELF, you may easily feel vulnerable, frustrated, confused, insecure, clueless, lost in your own skin.  If the TRUE YOU does not exist, the YOU will battle to survive life.

BUT:  If you take the time and make the effort to find your TRUE SELF, you will:
-  have a powerful self-knowledge that results in self-worth and self-confidence that will make you unstoppable ...
-  stop blaming and complaining by taking control of your life, your rules and your destiny ...
-  never live in denial again because you will know your own thoughts, feelings, desires ...
-  never depend on others for approval again for you will live your own true identity ...
-  never depend on others for acceptance because you will be your own person and proud of your own whole picture!

Why?  Because our sense of SELF (self-value) lies at the root of almost everything that happens in our life.  It affects the way we think about ourselves, how we relate to other people, the way we perceive obstacles and challenges, and whether we live in denial and hide from life or throw ourselves enthusiastically into it.

YOU, as in YOUR TRUE SELF, is indeed the centre and the core of your whole existence.  Maybe you never had the opportunity to find out who you really are and maybe that special sense of self was stolen from you through a sad childhood or bad circumstances, but this is now your opportunity to find it or to reclaim it.

The BandAid Strip offers short LIFE MAKEOVER e(mail)-courses which is the easiest, fastest and funnest way to find the REAL YOU.  These popular, effective, confidential, convenient, and AFFORDABLE courses involve self-help step-by-step guidelines and fun work assignments with powerful self-discovery results that can change YOU and YOUR LIFE forever.  These courses are available in both AFRIKAANS and ENGLISH.

All you have to do is to send an email for more information and then you take it from there:

Thank you for spending time with me and may an abundant life follow you wherever you go.

'Til next time:  be good, be kind and be grateful!

(Your secret friend in need ... 'cos nobody needs to know!)


Party vrouens beleef baie ... en beleef ... en beleef.  Dinge het met
hulle gebeur wat nie regverdig was nie, nie reg was nie en nie goed was nie - en het hulle diep verwond agtergelaat - getraumatiseer deur gevoelens
van smart en verlies ...

As jy innerlik en emosioneel verwond is, affekteer dit jou psige
op baie verskillende maniere.  'n Vrou wat getraumatiseer is, kan dikwels nie helder dink nie.  Sy voel soms verward
en deurmekaar in haar denke, dit voel asof haar emosies haar kop oorheers. 
Sy vind dit baie moeilik om 'n emosionele balans te handhaaf omdat haar wonde rou en oop bly, en haar eiewaarde erg geknou is ... 

Sy voel byna "ontmens" -  selfs minder as 'n mens.  Daar is 'n afskilfering van haar identiteit en eiewaarde.  Daar
is 'n verlaagde begrip van haar individualiteit - van dit wat haar uniek maak.  Daar is 'n gevoel dat haar lewe onherroepelik besmet en verlaag is.  Sy voel kwesbaar, tog ook soms bitter en woedend omdat sy die onskuldige slagoffer van 'n ander mens se gemeenheid en wreedheid was ...

God roep ons egter tot vergifnis en een van die grootste foute wat ons omtrent vergifnis maak, is dat ons dink dit beteken om te "vergeet", wat
onmoontlik is.   Vergifnis beteken nie om te vergeet nie;  vergifnis is om los te kom van die web van pyn sodat jy kan begin genees ... 

Ons weet ons is genees wanneer ons nie meer in die verwonding van die verlede leef nie, wanneer ons nie meer verstrik is in die gevoelens wat met die wond vereenselwig word nie.  Maar moenie
die proses aanjaag nie!

'n Wond is 'n gebeurtenis, maar genesing is 'n proses
wat 'n letsel meebring wat beteken die pyn het sy houvas oor jou verloor ...

Vergifnis is 'n belangrike stap in die proses van genesing, maar ons moet seker maak dat ons nie ander se sondes of die blaam daarvoor op ons neem nie, en ons moet ook besef en aanvaar dat God ook nie verantwoordelik gehou kan word vir die dade van slegte mense nie.  

Skande is iets wat mense op jou plaas, maar God roep jou by jou naam en nie volgens die naam van jou pyn of skande nie.  Hy sÍ vir jou:  Jy is Myne en al wat saakmaak is aan Wie jy behoort - nie wat met jou gebeur het nie ...

Moenie dat ander mense of jou pyn, lyding, vernederings of ander se sonde jou definieer nie! 
Wees jou eie mens ...

Dit is tyd om wins te maak uit  jou pyn en jou lewe te hervat!


is extremely difficult to identify because it is often subtle and secret.  It leaves no physical "marks" but serious psychological consequences ... 

Emotional abuse doesn't just go away, it gets worse over time as it erodes a person's self-esteem, confidence, and trust in their own judgment.  It is similar to brain washing - it can cause a victim to question reality and their own sanity, which leaves them at the mercy of
relying on the very person (the bully) who is abusing them ..."

The PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE man:  the king of lies and deceit

"The man with passive aggressive behaviour has to have someone to be
the object of his covert hostility. 
He needs a woman whose expectations and demands he can resist as he plays out the dance he learned from child-hood.

He can never be angry or show anger, but he will cowardly stick it to her in underhanded ways ... he will resist
giving her what she wants and needs which will set up a pattern of frus-tration in her and she will end up expressing the anger that he is unable to ..."


"Life with a narcissist is living an illusion based on falsehoods.  Nothing is real except the emotional abuse and brainwashing ...

His goal is to disempower you into a heap of nothing. A narcissist hates weakness and your weakness (when you are his victim) just gives him more fuel and ammunition for attacking you ...

But the truth is, the narcissist is the weak one.  The one who has such an incredibly low sense of self-worth hat he has had to learn the masterful art of projection in order to survive ...

Beware: Narcissists are twisted soul rapists, they will devour your insides and then spit you out! ..."

Hetť Fourie
The BandAid Strip Ministry

   Life Crisis Management Skills
   Self-help therapy courses